A JBoD P.S.A.: how a picture can be worth a thousand words

Since I work at a major tourist destination on San Francisco’s waterfront, we fairly often get calls for missing children. For the most part these are younger children who got separated from their parents in crowds.

There are many people about, many distractions both visual and aural which contribute to quickly disorienting both child and parent. In the vast majority of cases, we reunite them within minutes (7 to 9 on average). My intent here is to point out a couple of things which can help first responders greatly: with digital media readily available, whether you use a camera or have one on your cell phone, take a picture of your child (or children) before venturing in crowded venues. From head to toe.

Secondly, if you have to provide a description of what the child is wearing (mothers are much better at this than dads), describing footwear is paramount. In the (hopefully) unlikely event that the child was grabbed either by an estranged parent or a predator, we will focus on what shoes children are wearing as we scan crowds: if the abductor planned to switch the child’s clothing, due largely to time constraints, he/she will not remove the shoes.

Shoes and hair color. When minutes count, this is the bare minimum.

child-dog-11


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Caturday late edition

My first Caturday in quite a while is dedicated to Miss Jenny, the fabulous  kittoon… I’ve not been able to sit and type about our pointy eared folk since Mazuzu passed, partly because the whole experience was so puzzling, like some sort of s****y real life cliffhanger.

caturday
For Mazuzu Whang

There was the possibility that Jenny introduced the virus which ultimately took over Maz after we adopted her. We don’t know and never will since there is no test for FIP.  Rudha-an read up on this more than I and it may be that this disease may be a growing threat, affecting many more pets. At this point my understanding of it is largely empirical and  will require a lot more reading. Be that as it may, both Jenny and Tito have been coming out of their shells ever so slowly these past few months.

Tito
Moi?

Tito now spends time on our bed, sometimes under covers when he’s not playing with Jenny. He coos and trills happily, greets me home from work with a game of ‘fetch’ and is generally more relaxed than I’ve ever seen him. As to Jenny, she likes to rove around on the bed, once in a while stopping by to nibble an eyebrow, lick my skull or lightly ‘bite’ it while purring up a storm.

Jenny
Sugar and spice and a touch of evil

And still, despite better diet, she’ll ‘grace’ me with a fart, in her completely innocent, matter-of-fact way.  Her way of putting a spell on us is to fart in our general direction…

Christmas Movie Madness: “rare exports: a Christmas tale”

The evil of Farther Christmas has been unleashed upon the world once more. Can a small group of reindeer herders catch him in time to sell it to the Americans?

Rare exports: a Christmas tale” – (2010, Finland, 84 minutes – rated R)

Like all industries, Christmas is made up of many businesses, the more unsavory and dangerous ones, the more “interesting” the folklore.

The hunters
The hunters

While NORAD pretends to track Santa’s sleigh every year, the real hunting takes place on the frozen ground of Northern Finland, Lapland to be exact. There, rough men practice skills honed over generations, working in groups of three: the tracker, the marker and the sniper. Their quarry is the Wild Father Christmas, an elusive and savage predator pouncing on reindeer and naughty children alike. The following video is NSFW:

In “Rare exports: a Christmas tale“, Mount Kurvatunturi, the site where Father Christmas was entombed is being “excavated” with explosives  by an American company, Unwittingly, they unleash the ancient evil. It is now up to local reindeer herders and father and son Rauno and Pietari Kontio (Jorma and Onni Tommila) to capture the beast and sell it to the Americans.

Rare Exports

based on  the 2003 short “Rare Exports, Inc.” posted above, “Rare Exports: a Christmas tale” is another highly enjoyable example of dry, dead-pan Nordic humor, in the vein of “Trollhunter” or “the sound of noise“. Monty Python lives…  And…

… Father Christmas is out there, ravenous, nasty and lethal. Until the tame final product, result of hard work and hours of beatings, is fit for shipment around the world. “Rare exports: a Christmas tale” is where it begins…

Rare Exports: a Christmas tale” gets five jellybeans. They should show this in schools.

5 beans


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Midnight Movie Madness : “the sound of noise”

The sound of noise” – (102 minutes, Sweden/France, 2010 – rated R)

Drummers Magnus (Magnus Borjeson) and his pal Sanna (Sanna Persson) are speeding along Swedish freeways in a van, when Sanna’s rythmic (erratic?) driving prompts a motorcycle cop to give chase, which all ends up looking like a terrorist plot after the crashed van is found at the German embassy’s gates and the tick-tock of the metronome on the dash sounds like a bomb to the cops.

Crazy?

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Moody Tuesday: silver skies and grey waters

Counting down to Halloween on this gloomy Tuesday morning, let’s stroll through Autumn, Ray Bradbury’s country.

I hope you’ll enjoy these photos as I do, taken between the beaches of San Francisco, Golden Gate Park and the Shoreline at Mountain View, CA.

“That country where it is always turning late in the year. That country where the hills are fog and the rivers are mist; where noons go quickly, dusks and twilights linger, and midnights stay. That country composed in the main of cellars, sub-cellars, coal-bins, closets, attics, and pantries faced away from the sun. That country whose people are autumn people, thinking only autumn thoughts. Whose people passing at night on the empty walks sound like rain.”

― Ray Bradbury, The October Country

Gulls over Baker Beach

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Caturday: the candle beats

Not that the pointy eared ones really care, but today’s post is about belated birthday wishes for them. If it wasn’t for the fact that they sleep, oh say about 17 hours each day, their parkour play moves and Klingon-style luvvin’ would make you think they’re burning the candle at both ends.

Our wish is for them to meow long and loud and for many years to come. Happy birthday, you little @$#%*&#!

Jenny and Tito's birthday cardIn fact, if they were human, I think they might be Swedish percussionists running from the Law in the JBoDmobile (more on that later)…

“What greater gift than the love of a cat?”

– Charles Dickens

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Traveling with pets: additional musings

Ah, San Francisco… We fancied a trip to Baker Beach yesterday and took a long walk barefoot through the edge of the surf, having the enchanting experience of watching porpoises breaching the waves just offshore.

Baker Beach, a week ago

At one point a sea lion pup watched us before slipping back under the water, while dogs chased birds and each other, a perfect jellybeansofdoom kind of day.

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Midnight Movie Madness: “The fall” (2006)

The fall” – (117 minutes, India/USA, 2006 – rated R)

In a Los Angeles hospital of the 1920s, a 5 year old Romanian girl named Alexandria (Cantinca Untaru) is recovering from a broken arm she suffered picking up oranges with her migrant workers parents. Relieving the monotony of long days in this adult world is her accidental meeting of another patient, Roy Walker (Lee Pace), a young movie stuntman.

"The fall" title
Opening title

Roy is bedridden after performing a stunt he intended to impress the film’s female lead. The opening sequence of “the fall“, a gorgeous black and white montage using Beethoven’s 7th symphony, reveals what happened after Roy plunged off a railroad bridge on horseback into the river below, killing his horse and wrenching his back.

The fall iron horse
… And the Iron Horse

As it turns out, Roy is not only just as bored as Alexandria, he is contemplating suicide, the hopeless romantic…

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David Fincher’s “the girl with the dragon tattoo”

“The girl with the dragon tattoo” – (158 minutes, USA, 2011 – rated R)

The_Girl_with_the_Dragon_Tattoo_Poster

I wanted to like this. Great cast, great director, great story… But like Steven Spielberg, David Fincher hits it about as much as he misses, and the opening sequence of “the girl with the dragon tattoo” is the best part of the movie.

Steven Zaillian is credited as screenwriter for this adaptation and described on imdb as a veteran scrip doctor. Here, it appears the doctor killed the patient. You very seldom get a strong female character matched to a strong female lead as was the case with Salander and Noomi Rapace. To say this version adds nothing to the original Swedish film is true but incomplete: the character treatment of Lisbeth Salander amounts to character assassination, although at 158 minutes it’s more like a prolonged torture session.

SPOILER ALERT BELOW.

When Lisbeth rescues Blomqvist from the killer and chases after him,  she actually asks Blomqvist for his permission to kill the bad guy. In Fincher’s “girl with the dragon tattoo”, Lisbeth subordinates herself to Blomqvist, which is not just contrary to the source material (book and film), but bizarre…

The book’s original title, Män som hatar kvinnor, means “men who hate women”, and makes me wonder at the guys involved here. Too bad, so sad, avoid this stinker. This gets no beans.

0 beans

UPDATE BY Rudha-an

Here is the opening title sequence that Lastech mentioned. It’s the best part of the movie.

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Caturday: four legged Klingons

“And they call it kitty love…”

That’s where the cuteness ends: Jenny starts by kissing on Tito, they exchange a few licks, and settle down for a minute, maybe a few seconds.

Tito & Jenny on love cushion
The quiet before the storm

Then the wrestling begins. The headlocks and body slamming, what every Trekker recognizes as the Klingon mating ritual, somewhat different from the Vulcan mating ritual which also involves ass kicking, but of a Starship Captain.

Star Trek yourself
Someone could get hurt…

As I type this, for instance, Jenny is still greeting me home, dancing figure eights under the chair, pawing at my leg and grabbing my arm to rub against. With purring and claws. I’m already bleeding in three spots. I got bit. Not too hard but firmly.

I will show you a paper tiger
I will show you a paper tiger

Must be the Tortie (Tortoiseshell) in her, the little brute. As a wrestler, she has a very solid stance: wide with hind legs bent. We saw her more than once using this position to wrap Tito in an embrace before slamming him down. Then again, he gives as good as he gets, and even has her retreating often, though never for long. Never for long.

I’m bleeding from a fourth scratch now.

Jenny will also walk on my pillow stopping just long enough to nom on my skull. If I pet her, which I always do, she farts. If my wife leans over to nose bonk her, Jenny’ll cough in her face, like Carol Beer on “Little Britain”:

Her newest trick: not a cough, but a vurp (a burp which sounds vomitous). All I can say is thank Ceiling Cat she doesn’t eat mice. Things are gross enough. Annnnd, I’ve got an eighth scratch… Well, a puncture, more like… Still, I feel like one of Jack the Ripper’s playthings.


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